Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Growing older

On Saturday January 24th I will be 35 years old. Not that age really matters to me anymore. Birthdays only seem to be of any importance when they are special milestones and most of those happen in childhood. I remember that turning 10 was an awesome birthday because I was now in the "double digits". Turning 13 was another milestone because then I was finally a "Teenager". Sixteen, of course, was monumental because, well, I was 16 (and not too sweet either). LOL! Naturally, my 18th birthday was a huge deal to me because I was "officially an adult". Twenty one is another big birthday but I had just found out I was pregnant with Tanner so I didn't even get to have a drink to celebrate the fact that I was finally "of drinking age". After that, I quit caring about birthdays. I assumed turning 30 would have been difficult because you are leaving your youth behind or something silly like that but to me, it was just another number. Internally, I still feel 18. My mind feels as young and vibrant as I did when I was in high school. The only difference is that my body does not reflect the same youthful appearance. LOL!

I remember sitting down with my grandfather and asking him what his internal age was. You know what he told me? He told me 24. I was a little taken aback but in a way, not too surprised all at the same time. He explained to me that we are who we are. There comes a point of time in our life when we wake up and become adults. It doesn't happen the moment you turn of legal age, for some it happens earlier for others later. The important thing is that it happens to all of us when "we wake up and smell the coffee". When life seems to take on new meaning. When we realize that we are who we make ourselves, when we know that our actions and choices we make will change our lives in positive and negative ways. When that happens, we are mentally fixed to that age forever.

Once I discovered that my grandfather and I were peers in our internal age, our relationship changed. Instead of just the grandfather - granddaughter relationship, we became friends. I feel blessed to have been fortunate enough to know him this way. It has also helped me realize that growing older does not matter. Age is only a number, a natural progression. Who we are is what really matters.

4 comments:

The Squared One said...

That's a wonderful blog post Chantele!!! Happy birthday coming up soon. Hey will you be at CHA at that time? No matter how OLD you are, you'll always be a few months younger than me. hee hee :) :)

Aubree said...

I too just turned 35 and began to reflect on what that means to me....I personally will always be 27.

NancyJones said...

awwwwwwwwwwwww Happy birthday to youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Somedays I believe that your only as old as you feel and then somedays not so much..
I guess that makes sense on why me and Bella get along so well rofl... I think Im still 5!! But most days my body feels 85 rofl. (were we talking mentally though?)
That's a whole nuther post!)

We will have to through you a big bash when you get back from CHA!
whehehwwwww!
I cant wait to hear about your good times and I know you.. You will have fun where ever you are and a VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY IM SURE ((((hugs))))) my friend!

jan williams said...

Your Grandfather was a wise Man!!!

My granddaughter thinks I am her age, and thats OK with me!!!

It's good that you have such fond memories of your grandfather..
I know what you mean about being friends, My papaw and I had gotten really close before he died, and to this day before I do anything I always think to myself, what would he have thought about it!!!